December 2006 Archives

A service providing age regressed photos of your adult pet as a puppy or kitten.

From this:

To this:

Everyone loves pupppy and kitten pictures, right? Especially ones of their own pets. In fact, pictures are one of the best things about puppies -- in real life, they are messy and destructive, but in pictures, they are tidily adorgable!

One of the drawbacks to adopting an adult dog is that you don't often get puppy pictures of them.

In my case, I was so busy cleaning up after Pica that I didn't take as many pictures as I would have liked. (It's hard to believe it was almost three years ago that we got her.)

So, this service would offer age regression photos of dogs and cats. You'd bring in a contemporary photo, and they'd use Photoshop wizardry to make it look like it might have as a cute lil' ball of fur.

This would help shelters place cats and dogs, I think, because the shelters could show the cute little pictures in the ads for them. So instead of this, they could pitch this.

As it turns out, the age regression/progression word space is fairly polluted, as Chris would say -- with either fetish sites or missing children bulletins (although I suppose "polluted" is maybe the wrong word in that case). Not to mention general wierdness.

I'd never been in an accident before (let alone a four car pileup on a busy freeway at rush hour!!), so I wasn't sure what to expect. Here, for your low-key, low-stakes rubbernecking pleasure, is the kind of excitement I've experienced so far:

The police officer who took everyone's statement called bright and early the next day and gave me everyone's contact information. He also told me the driver who had caused the accident (the one on her cell phone) had been cited for reckless driving. He was super nice. I'd taken some people's information, but not the woman who caused the accident because she seemed really distraught, and the cops told me they'd give it to me.

The woman who caused the accident was driving a car covered by Farmer's Insurance, although it's called Mid-Century Insurance for some reason, when you call the number, they say "Farmers" -- nothing like an insurance company with a pseudonym to make you feel like you're in good hands.

"Bad Faith Insurance Companies" (dot org -- catchy url!) rates Farmers as #5 in the NON-PAYMENT OF CLAIMS HALL OF SHAME. (My insurance company, Travelers, is #4, which isn't much comfort, given that they cover my house and car. Maybe I'll check out these guys next time -- they got a really good rating in the Consumer Guide to Oregon Insurance Complaints [PDF download]).

I called Farmers/aka Mid-Century to file my claim and it turned out (or so they said) that I was the first one involved to call, so they wanted to take down everyone's information (contact, and insurance, car etc.) from me. I was like, "um, why don't I call you back later, after you've had a chance to look over the police report, rather than spending the next hour on the phone with you?" The guy who took my call described to me in detail an apparently hilarious ad that my insurance company has on TV. He was like, "That's one funny ad -- I'll give 'em props for that!" So, that was friendly enough.

I filled out an accident report form and biked it over to DMV. That was quick and easy -- just a matter of dropping it off. I didn't even have time to eat my burrito in the waiting room which, as it turns out, doesn't allow eating, anyway. I was kind of irked about that for no good reason -- ask Chris: it doesn't take much to make me surly.

While I was in the parking lot at DMV (which, by the way, doesn't have a bike stand -- I thought that was appropriate but funny), the Farmer's agent called to take my statement. I had her call me back at home. She recorded my account of the accident on the phone, making a big deal out of getting my agreement and all (as she should) and during it she'd say things like, "and then the green car hit you?" and I'd say, "no, then your client's car hit me" or, "and then the green car hit the pickup?" and I'd say, "no, then your client's car hit the pickup." When she turned off the recorder I said, "Now we can start cussing!" and it took her a second to realize I was joshing her, not that it was all that funny.

After my statement, when I asked about a rental car, she said that Farmers may not be liable, even though the driver was cited for reckless driving and had told the police officer on the scene, "it was my fault!" The reasons is because the policy on the car didn't name her. (When I talked to the Oregon Insurance Commission, they said that if the owner said she'd taken the car without permission, it's possible they can get out of it, even if the car wasn't reported stolen.)

She also told me that there might not be enough money to cover us all because the policy only had $50,000 on it for property damage. I said given that the cars involved were a 2001 Hyundai, a 1988 Volvo wagon, and an older pickup that drove away, I didn't see how that would be a problem. She said, "yeah, well, maybe there will be enough." I think she was just trying to get my expectations really, really low in preparation for low-balling me (but really, how low can you low ball a 1988 Volvo with 220K on it? I guess it's probably just reflex). I assured her I wouldn't rent a Kompressor, in any case.

Now it's been three days since the accident, and I haven't heard back from Farmers since the day before yesterday. Yesterday, I rented a Ford Focus, which is a piece of shit but at least the heater works! I talked to my insurance agent this morning. Because I only have liability (I don't even know if they issue collision for cars as old as mine) they won't do much more than give me free advice. She didn't improve my optimism about dealing with Farmers much -- she said sometimes they tend to stall on cases -- but she had a good suggestion, which was to talk to the Oregon Insurance Commission. I called their consumer information number, 503-947-7984, and they were super informative. They told me that the insurance companies get 45 days to investigate an accident, and that if I haven't heard anything by three weeks I should file a complaint and they might be able to "put a fire under them."

I've left two messages on the Farmer's agent's voicemail today with no response. She gave me a Vancouver number.

I wish it didn't feel like I was dealing with a bunch of used car sales people, especially since I may soon be doing that, too.

Update

The insurance agent called me back to let me know that the car the cell-phoning-accident-causing woman was driving was not named in her policy, and she doesn't know who was named on the policy -- maybe it was CPACW, maybe not - she's not handling that part of the case. SIGH.

Wind Up Birds, Phantom Lights, Pocket Parade and Teri Untalan will be playing a benefit for Girls Rock Camp this Saturday (December 9) at Satyricon.

Yes -- it's back! And now it's all ages -- Satyricon + All Ages + Girls Rock Camp-- it all seems very appropriate.

Cover is $5. Show starts at 8 pm. Satyricon is at 125 NW 6th Ave Portland.

I was in an accident this afternoon -- a four-car pileup on I-5 headed south, right before the split for 405 and the Fremont Bridge. Everyone seemed fine, although the girl who seems to have caused the accident was sobbing pretty loud for awhile. I can't really blame her -- it was a dramatic scene, and I would be pretty upset if I'd made a mess like that.

Apparently she told the police officer taking reports that she was talking on her cell phone and didn't notice that traffic in her lane had come to a stop. She tried to swerve to avoid it, rear-ended one car, bumped into my front end, then bounced off to hit another truck. So, three in one blow! Considering how she was knocked around, it's a wonder she wasn't hurt -- airbags probably helped.

Two of the cars looked actually totaled. My car may be fiscally totaled because it doesn't take much body work to add up to more than a 1988 Volvo is worth ... we'll see. We were all towed from the scene. God knows I don't have comprehensive on my car, so with any luck she's insured. If they total it, I probably won't end up with a whole lot -- not enough to buy another car, for sure, so that kind of sucks. On the other hand, it was up to 220K and it was probably a matter of time before something happened to retire it. It may still be drivable with a little work -- hard to tell now because the hood won't open (it sounds like a fan is running into something and everything is basically knocked an inch to the left).

The cops and the road cleanup crew were nice -- I had a chance to talk to them because there was a lot of standing around while the cop took statements (apparently only one police is supposed to take all the reports because insurance attorneys have manipulated manipulated the multi-cop narrative in the past. )

But you know who sucked? The cars who honked while passing us. In particular, one trucker who let off his airhorn for about 90 seconds while he drove past -- I had to put my hands over my ears -- it hurt! One of the cops said he should have pulled him over, and I wish he had. I couldn't believe his lack of compassion. For all he knew, someone had been seriously hurt, and it definitely sucked for all of us involved -- maybe even a little bit more than his having been caught in traffic.

The traffic jam behind us was awful - the accident blocked three of the four lanes. I understand being frustrated, but to take it out on the road workers who are cleaning up, the cops taking statements, and people who were in what was, after all, an accident just seemed like the height of boorishness. (Even if you wanted to target her, the girl who ran into me wasn't being bothered by the airhorn -- she was in her mother's car -- who'd come to pick her up. I know it's easy to hate people who talk on cell phones in their car, but the poor thing looked about 20, and she wasn't getting much sympathy from the cops or the road crew already.)

Anyway, if anyone reading this has ever been tempted to honk at an accident scene while driving by: don't.

Bike Portland is holding a raffle for that Amsterdam bicycle I lust after. $4 is a price even I'd be happy paying for one of those beautiful beasts.

I was reading Bike Portland to see if anyone was talking about applying for one of the bicycle safety mini grants offered by the Community Cycling Center, the grants go up to $5,000.

It occurred to me that this could be a good source of support for my Public Safety Campaign For Poor and Working Adults on Bikes idea. I wrote about it in 2003, and in 2005, someone actually did it, although without the focus on bars and the North Portland Peninsula, I think -- and completely independently of me, of course.

Congratulations to Rich over at Heavy Heavy Water for winning recently winning the New Yorker Cartoon Anti-Caption Contest. Some of the other entries are pretty (un)funny, too, but I think Rich's really gets to the point of the contest.

A friend of a friend of a friend (no, really -- I've met her at parties) was a finalist for the regular caption context once. My brain doesn't think that way.